Although I have never been further away from Australia (geographically and in terms of political interest), Tony Abbott doesn’t get out of my mind. His newest strike brings him into the league of autocrats no one can hide from.
It wasn’t just to my but apparently also to the journalist’s surprise that Tony Abbott is now even entering the most personal sphere of Australia’s citizens. What sounds like a big joke to every innocent reader does certainly perplex all those already worried for the nanny state which Australia has become over time. For sure, I would neither consider Aussies an overly communicative breed when it comes to intimacy nor had I ever observed them to be very sensual in their general interactions with others, but is it really that bad?
Maybe it’s just another of Mr Demolition’s deal favouring his kind and closest family? Or even worse, Abbott’s way to show gratitude for the (sexual) teachings he received from his so often cited Jesuit masters?
Clear is that while most sources claim Mr. Abbott having lost a large part of his supporters after only one year in presidency, Mr. Demolition has reached his target and established himself in the club of neo western autocrats, PEBA.
While Erdogan and Putin need to practise their sexual desires behind curtains for reasons that we won’t discuss here, Berlusconi at least deserves some credit for not having asked his voters to participate in his fancies and, instead, experimented with friends when it comes to the practical part of his sexual education.
Meanwhile, Swiss citizens have extensively discussed the sexual desires of one member of the national parliament. Although notoriously low-key media reports during European summer have certainly become an institution in Switzerland, what really irritates in this case is the fact that one personal SMS accompanied by a picture showing the genitals of said member had the power to keep the whole nation – including parliament(s) – busy for at least a month!
One can only wonder if Tony Abbott’s classes in “how to politely ask for more action in the bedroom” are a reaction to this rather embarrassing issue in Swiss politics or if Swiss citizens have become so overly boring that they would also need some more parliamentary action in their own bed.
For centuries, the church has controlled people’s sexual desires by telling us that any single thought of it was a sin and, all of a sudden, state representatives want to teach us how to make better use of them. This doesn’t add up. The state should dedicate itself to providing public goods and not mingle in our private life, now that the church has finally been dismantled. If politicians don’t get that one, they should change profession (I’m sure Mr. Murdoch finds some room in a TV show if you think that your sexual practices are so irresistible, Mr. Abbott).
In light of the many urgent topics citizens should be educated about, I’d plea to keep politicians’ sexual desires out of the public sphere and the state out of our beds, no matter how “feisty” one’s party colleagues, how pleasant the teachings of some Jesuit scholars or how “hard” one is sitting in office.
 I’m currently on a holiday in Europe
 Putin, Erdogan, Berlusconi, Abbott
 Referred to as „Sommer-Loch“ or „summer-void“ in English.